Look It Up!
Hello and welcome to our, “Look it Up!” section. Look it up will provide you all the latest wacko news stories that are going on currently. “Look it Up!” will also be filmed daily and brought to you via youtube.com so that you can experience the true meaning of what I am experiencing in every article that I write. But the most important part of, “Look it Up!” is the section where you, the American people, tell us what you think and what you want to know. What are you itching to know about this great country of ours? Send us your concerns and we will do the best to bring you all the knowledge that you are looking for.
Notes on a Scandal,
An unarmed man went into a bank in Dayton, Ohio today to rob it. His apparent use of force, A NOTE. The robber went up to a teller, unarmed and no ski mask, with a note that demanded money from her. The teller simply replied, “you don’t want to do this.” When the man was not getting any money from his demanding, terrorizing note, he tried to leave the bank. He didn’t do his research on the bank though because the teller flipped the alarm which entrapped the robber in a glass cage on the way out. No one was injured and no one got any money.
Frozen Margarita,
A 25 year old woman in Milwaukee celebrated her 25th birthday at a pub that she didn’t know. She apparently got stood up because the person that she came with left her. While the woman claims that she had only one drink, I think it is odd that she wound up staying there until closing time. She tried to call for a cab but for some reason mysteriously left. She went back to the bar but the owner was prohibited by law to let her back into the establishment. This happened to me last week at a TGI Fridays where I tried to pee after hours but they wouldn’t let me back in. I was tempted to pee in the parking lot, I wonder if that would have been breaking the law. Anyhow, she tried to walk home, caught frost bite and fell asleep. She was found some time later, practically frozen. She was only 73 degrees. She was revived although doctors are unsure if she will be able to use her arms and legs at this point. Apparently these doctors didn’t see the episode of, “Grey’s Anatomy,” when Meredith was frozen for almost eight hours. But, she came back.
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The Ding and the Dong
The Dong:
Geert Wilders, 43, a member of parliament for the right-wing Party for Freedom
Wilders made a controversial film in the Netherlands speaking out against Islam. He took Quran verses throughout the fifteen minute film.
Seriously, I think the major dong in this situation is the fact that his name is Geert, come on, Geert?
But really, who does this guy think he is? This guy is a lawmaker promoting freedom, why does he think he should bash the religion? Any smart person knows that these terrorist guys use religion to brainwash their minions to do the dirty bomb work. If these head guys, REALLY felt the way they did they would be blowing up themselves instead of telling others that they will get blessed doing it. Where did Mohammed or Islam say this was their law in their text? So you’re doing everyone a favor by pointing terrorism to a religion. Don’t you remember the crusades or Bloody Mary? Dong on you!
The Ding:
We have to give the ding to Barrack Obama. First African American President. But since its his first day at work we are going to give him this ding, maybe he wont get another one again so he gets it now. And on Tuesday his administration halted the Gitmo cases until the torture is under review. So let’s see, maybe you might be the dong tomorrow but President Obama, you have my ding today!
Look it Up! January 23, 2008
The Ding and the Dong:
The Ding:
I hate to seem always left-winged but I have to give today’s Ding to Hillary Clinton. Our new Secretary of the State was welcomed with more than opened arms when she showed up for her first day of work at the State Department. It seems almost as if she freed them from some gilded cage. Was Condi that bad?
The Dong:
I think the Dong needs to be awarded today from a member of my very far right side. Rush Limbaugh. Rush, you don’t support a President that hasn’t been in office for a week, already. You WANT him to fail, why is that? Like it or not, Barack Obama is our President. If you want him to fail then you want America to fail. Why do you open up your racist mouth to say something that is clearly political for you rather than the good of our country? Dong on you!
What’s Happenin’?
Kennedy vs. the Billo
What’s happenin’ today? Well, it looks like Caroline Kennedy won’t get her New York Senate seat. Oh well, I guess Governor Patterson decided to pick U.S. Rep. Kirsten Gillibrand to fill the spot instead. What I am hearing from other media news sources is that even though Kennedy dropped out of the race herself, Gov. Patterson wasn’t planning on choosing her anyway. My favorite person, Bill O’Reilly, who said, “we don’t report rumors just facts,” reported right before saying that statement that Kennedy was allegedly having an affair with a married man. This was reported in the New York Times. O’Reilly goes on to say that they got some information from, “a very high official within Gov. Patterson’s office,” that the Governor was not going to choose her. I love how they know this fact, but they just don’t know who said it.
No Mo’ Gitmo
O’Reilly also warned and probably scared and fueled some of those crazy Americans that watch his show that President Obama is dangerous and we are at danger now because of the President’s orders to shut down Guantanamo Bay. I don’t know why they think that a nation of civil liberties and equal values should torture any prisoners. Through all the torture of the suspected terrorists that are being held there, they never seemed to let us know where Osama bin Laden is. So what is the information that water boarding has gotten us if the world is much more dangerous now then before Bush was in office? If it is not used to make us safer than things need to go. I know the Middle East hates us for the most part but I also I think it does show good faith to them on our part that we aren’t cruel people. We are better than they will ever be. I know we are never going to please them but seriously, the man that resigned from there because he felt so bad about the torture that he confessed to his priest and feels like a terrible person? That says a lot. I think if we are going to make people torture others we should have Dick Cheney do it. He has no problem screwing people over and hurting them where it really hurts.
Apple Make’s Oranges!
Apple’s profits went up 6% this year I am glad that at least one American corporation is making money! Go get a job at Apple!
Restrict Knife use to Waffles
What was up with the guy in Belgium that ran into the nursery and started stabbing people? He killed a kid as well as an adult in the process. YOU ARE WORST THAN THE DONG OF THE DAY.
When the “Brain” left the Stems Came
I think it is strange that the week Bush is out of office stem cell research starts. I am happy for the advancement! I am happy for stem cell research too!
Not Another Hypocrite!
Can anyone help me find out why we are bombing on Pakistan? I know that they are bad dudes and harbor lots of terrorist there, but I thought, Mr. President, that we were going to work some stuff out first???? Isn’t that what you said yesterday? I may have voted for you but I’m WATCHING YOU!
Poll: Who thinks water boarding is okay under special circumstances?
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Look it Up!
What’s Happenin’?
So what happened today March 3, 2009? Well I made a major discovery today…. its my birthday month! But, unlike most years, I didnt get too drunk yet. Strange year….